Picking Up the Tab—All the Time
More often than not, women are starting to have no problem paying half on dates, picking up the tab from time to time, or lending their man money. The problem occurs when it happens ALL THE TIME. There is a problem if a woman is continuously financially supporting their man or paying for the couple’s leisure time.
However, I’m not saying that men should be threatened by the stature of their woman. But their woman should not be pulling all the weight financially. Not only does it put a strain on the relationship, it can harm the faith she has that the relationship will be financially stable in the future.
“Give an inch, Take a Mile”
I have seen many situations where my friends are constantly giving, and their man does not give back. The exchange of money should be mutual, there should be a deal going on. If the woman pays the bill for the dinner, the man should pay for the movie & the ride home.
If you’re constantly buying your man things or lending money there needs to be some type of compensation some way, some how. And sometimes “compensation” in the bedroom isn’t enough. Women like to be splurged on and spoiled just as much or maybe even more than men.
When there is no compensation, the relationship starts to become awkward. How do you ask for your money back? How do you tell your man that he needs to pick up the slack? What about if he doesn’t even have job to even pay you back? (Well you shouldn’t have given him the money in the first place!).
Loving you is Complicated!!!
But it gets complicated. You don’t want to threaten their ego or make it a bigger issue. But you need your money. When ever my friends come to me about financial issues, I tell them to stop giving. Primarily if the boyfriend hasn’t made an effort to return the favor.
Even this is hard because as a girlfriend we want to support our man, and just give them everything. We become so consumed in giving, that we don’t realize that it’s slowly affecting our relationship. We don’t notice until our man has become so dependent on us to give them money, that it’s become some type of allowance.
If he’s good for paying back, or there’s an even split of funds then there’s no problem. If you’re in doubt, when he does ask you for money make sure he’s good for it & he puts his money where his mouth is.
-Miquira J.
